The concept of ‘dating’ has never really appealed to me. As you walk along the street, nervous to meet a stranger whose masterful use of Instagram filters has convinced you that they look like a real person, one whom you find interesting because they like reading and traveling.

It usually takes two or three glasses of wine to make you start talking about yourself – trying to impress while not sounding like a moron – and assessing whether it’s not a total dud, if you are feeling uninhibited enough to let them taste you or if you are in love. Besottedness has never been a problem for me. While I have dated and continue to date, it’s the best way to meet people if you are a niche market, and trans women are the most niche. As the blue cheese of the modern dating scene, we are the obscure progressive jazz album. Since people frequently ask me about Rencontre trans, I thought I’d avoid repeating myself and share my experience dating as a trans woman here.

Trans Women Are Attractive To Men – But They’re Not Gas!

My cisgender friends have found it odd that I would not expect to date gay men, one of the weirdest things I have had to explain to them in the past year. In the past, yes, but that was because I was living in the wrong gender role, sweetheart. It is common for gay men to gravitate towards men and the physical attributes associated with masculinity.

You Can Go About Dating In Different Ways

Personal taste is involved here. Transgender girls may choose to disclose their gender identity when using a standard dating app like Tinder. If I mention the teeny, tiny fact that I used to be a boy, I personally would rather not talk to someone for a long time to avoid the possibility that they will go nuclear and call me a freak or another form of abuse. In result, I state in my bio right away that I am trans – so if a man approaches me, I do not have to worry about disclosing my gender identity. Additionally, he’s more likely to have romance with or date a trans woman already.

Transgender Sexual Health Guide: Safer Sex

If You Are Dating, It Is Your Responsibility To Take Care Of Your Safety And Health

I am everyone’s cool mom in this situation. HIV is a risk for trans girls at least as great as it is for gay men. LGBT and beyond are already suffering from a lack of HIV awareness, but what little information there is about romanceual health is mostly geared toward gay men, and we get left out. Every romance encounter with a trans woman should include condom use/having a trans man use condoms and getting tested for dating activity if they are.

In addition, basic safety: sadly, even romantic partners can be violent towards trans women. The first time you meet someone, try to meet somewhere public, or at least try to let a friend know what you are going to do. My friend, I know what you’re thinking – that “call the police if I don’t text later” message is a buzzkill. I understand that we’ve all ignored this advice, but I’m trying to do my best.

Finally

Be yourself. gender dysphoria is a bitch and makes us question ourselves a lot. When I decided to start dating I was worried that my facial hair shadow and my voice were still too ‘male’ and I would be rejected for not being feminine enough. Actually, that’s a loser’s game, and if you want to date someone he should be willing to accept you as you are. Dating and being trans is hard enough without trying to be somebody else.